New Adventure!

I've been terribly unfaithful to this chronicle of our lives. Thanks for your faithfulness to read these words from time to time!

I want to invite you to check out my new writing adventure: Launching Rocket Babies!

Here's an excerpt from the title post:

I am not a rocket scientist. Not even close. But I’m married to one. Sort of. Actually he’s a mechatronics engineer, employed by NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory, designing mechanisms to deploy satellite hardware to the tiniest fraction of a micron (link to definition). Somehow, by some glorious cocktail of natural talent and positive life experience, his brain works that way. Mine does not. Don’t get me wrong, I achieved good grades in school--even in math and science! But my natural affinity aligns more with words, art, and social interactions. While Jonathan is far from the stereotypical anti-social nerd type (*ahem* Sheldon), and he writes well enough author academic papers, needless to say, we’re wired a little differently. Which is wonderful.

Then along came our darling little children. Two boys, currently 3.5 and 0.75 (See what I did there? I can be scientific!) And while the younger one is still TBD, I see in the older one a lot of the natural tendencies that arguably served my husband well to get him where he is today. Of course, smarts are not only genetics, which brings me to my point. While I often feel massively unqualified, lacking a PhD in a STEM (Science Technology Engineering Mathematics) field, I want to give these littles a chance at becoming rocket scientists (if they want to).

So what does that look like? Good question. I don’t really know; that’s why I’m here. Because it’s not my natural inclination to explore, ask questions, experiment, be curious, research, figure things out, etc., I need a little accountability. I need a place to keep me intentionally adding a bit of STEM to this mothering gig. Who knows? Maybe we’ll end up launching some rocket babies.

Xander Joins the Family

Here he is.

After a long hot summer surviving on La Croix dressed up with fresh mint and frozen fruit, after those final weeks when grunts and sighs accompanied Eddie's invitation to play with him on the floor, after a limited wardrobe to go with my limited energy, and after hours upon hours of dreaming, planning, praying, and more dreaming...

He burst into our life!

Lil Alexander Man

Did I mention 21 hours of labor? Hey, that's half the time it took last time around! So I'll take it! I was forcing myself to choke down six dates everyday the weeks before he was born since they say it'll shorten early labor and help keep your water from breaking early on. Still I found myself with little baby contractions in the middle of the night, and after only a few hours of laying there in the dark trying to snooze, I heard/felt a *pop* followed by a little trickle. And everything proceeded to follow that familiar pattern--just like with Eddie, but in about half the time. 

Actually, laying in bed my contractions were the strongest and most consistent. Once I was up and moving, they came and went without hardly noticing. Every once in awhile there would be a really good one. Grammy was in town and came to stay with Eddie that morning while Jonathan and I stuck to our plan of a breakfast date. We did go to the Dish, that much closer to the hospital, just in case things would suddenly take a quick turn. They didn't. We took our time, went for a walk, did some window shopping. When we finally did get checked in to the hospital things were progressing steadily, just slowly. After several hours, right about 12 hours after my water had broken (with Eddie they let me go 24) I was put on pitocin to help speed things along (they actually remembered to turn it on this time!). And after several hours of that I felt like I'd accomplished my goal: make it as long as I can without an epidural. Once that kicked in at about 7:30 pm we settled in to wait for our precious little boy's arrival. We talked about his name. We still weren't 100% set, but since Eddie was ("His name is A'xander." He'd announce if you asked him about baby brother.), well, what do you do? 

Dr. Yun was not on call that weekend, but since the on-call doctor wasn't feeling well, she actually got to deliver him anyway! Just like with Eddie (noticing the theme?), after only a few pushes the staff cautioned that this part would be quick and they took their time. Almost everyone on the floor was in our room when he was born, perks of a small hospital with no other maternity patients, I guess. Lexi, our nurse, was a dear! She claimed we named him after her. She was a good sport with all my weird reactions to labor, heart rate speeding up with contractions being the strangest one.

Unlike giving birth to Eddie, this time I was on my back not my side so I could actually see as he made is debut. Wow, there really is nothing like babies being born. So miraculous, so amazing, but also so commonplace and ordinary at the same time. It's so strange to think that everyone has been born, but it's such a powerfully unique moment in time.

And then he was on my chest! Squirmy and red and chubby! Eight pounds, one ounce! They'd said he was measuring big! What a little honey!

And then, just when I thought my heart was full to bursting, the next morning Grammy brought Eddie to see his new baby brother! We'd done a lot of talking about what it would be like. On the way to the hospital he told Grammy he was nervous.

Weeks later, and still now, more than 2 months later, he'll randomly pronounce, "I love our baby! I'm not nervous anymore!"

Welcome, Lil Xander Man!

You are so loved!

The Altar of Life

Yesterday, as I reached for my journal, Eddie leaned from his place beside me on the couch and tugged on my arm.

"Scoot back," he said.

He wants to be close, to snuggle as he plays the shape game on the iPad and I write, read, sip coffee. It's rainy outside. Xander (I'll introduce you to him soon.) is content to snooze in the swing nearby.

This moment is all I treasure about Mom-hood in this season--my priesthood for now. Sure, there's a dryer full of laundry waiting to be folded and put away, emails need drafting, dirty dishes and unmade beds call for my attention. But I scoot back and snuggle in next to my little boy.

I chose to sit there and savor the moment, cherish it, offer it up like incense on the altar of my life.

"Welcome to your own priesthood, practiced at the altar of your own life."

-Barbara Brown Taylor

An Altar in the World

If there is a word that could sum up the past six months, I'd say cherish. In the months before giving birth again and welcoming another little boy into our family, I was doing my best to cherish the moments Eddie was my mom-world. To soak up with joy all the time I could give him my undivided attention without another mouth to feed, another bottom to clean, another little person needing me. I was taking note of the simplicity of life with just one child. I was cherishing the last times we'd do this or that as a family of three. 

Then my heart exploded as little Xander joined our family. And there was so much more to cherish, each moment calling to be held close because then it's gone. The little tiny baby stage is so fleeting, and the blur of adjustments and sleeplessness make it that much harder to really take in. There is a terrible ache in a mom's heart when her baby reaches milestones--all mixed in with the pride and delight and sheer joy of it! Because that means those little moments once savored are now memories to treasure. People tell you to enjoy this season because "it goes by so quickly!" Let me just say I've taken that advice to heart. These are cherished moments I'm living these days. And I don't want to miss a thing!

It's crossed our minds lately that we could rearrange Eddie's room to optimize space, because...

Yep! Coming in November!

So this is an option for optimizing space in our kids' room :)

Yippee for expanding our family!

Snapshots of Eddie Life

Here's the latest about our sweet lil Eddie! I've found I take more videos than I did before of our dear boy. It's just so amazing, his words, ideas and silly antics. So sprinkled in with the photos are some "moving snapshots" of his busy toddler life these days.

 Quite the artist!

Absolutely had a blast exploring a nearby canyon.

We have an outdoorsman!

"Rocketships" have become a recent favorite.

This is his countdown and "blastoff"!

This book was a baby gift from my dear friend and fellow Pride and Predjudice lover, Katie May.

It tells the basic plot line of the story, if you're not familiar with it. Eddie loves it because he can "read" it himself. 

He does love a good book!

Current favorites are Jonah, Daniel and the Lions, a great book we got from the library called "Flight 1-2-3", "Train Song", "The Very Hungry Caterpillar", and "Little Blue Truck".

And this is an old one from last fall, but oh so funny!
Thankfully, he has yet to figure out the climbing out part!

Never a dull moment! 

The Big Birthday Post

I only just realized I never documented all our birthday celebrations! With Eddie in December and then both Jonathan and I in January with Christmas sandwiched in between, it must have gotten lost in all the celebrating!

First,

Our lil' Eddie turns 2!

He does this adorable thing where he holds up both pointer fingers on each hand to say that he's two.

We had a little celebration with Great Grammy and Uncle Steven the weekend before his birthday. In typical two-year-old fashion, he only made it through one present, Steven's Thomas the Train play tent!

On the actual day, we went to a local mall in the evening. It's outdoors and was all decked out for Christmas. The whole month of December they do an evening "snowfall" where fine little white bubbles spray out from all over while "Let it Snow" plays in the background.

 He was actually kind of freaked out of the "snow".

(I don't blame him.)

And the highlight: riding the trolley car!

He kept calling it a "boose" (caboose). He LOVED it! 

(As we knew he would, anything train related is his favorite right now!)

In Illinois a few weeks later, Gramps made this awesome Thomas cake.

Eddie was impressed, but he was so fascinated by the blue rail train set he could hardly be pulled away from it, even for cake or presents! 

It went like this: 

"Eddie, it's time to open your birthday presents!"

Eddie: "NOOOOOOO!!!" (*sob*)

Then he'd half-heartedly open a present and get somewhat excited, only to return to the train! (This was a theme all through our Christmas, but he got his very own blue rail train from Gramps and Grammy, so we're all set!)

For my birthday, we were in San Diego at a work conference of Jonathan's. 

 Dunkin' Donuts!

Our hotel had this great deal which gave you a $5 coupon to spend at their restaurants for every day you didn't get your room cleaned. That goes a long way toward coffee and donuts! So Eddie and I shared a special birthday treat! He is now quite a fan of "donells"!

 That night we went out to a modern Italian restaurant in downtown San Diego.

So so so so delicious!

(I forgot to take a picture of the food before I ate it!)

Jonathan, unfortunately, had a miserable day at work on his birthday. Ugh! Adulthood is just not so fun sometimes! But we tried to make up for it with a special dinner at home!

 The one snapshot of celebrating Dad!

I made his favorite, bruschetta, and we put candles in yogurt dessert to sing. Eddie, having come to understand a little about what birthday means ("Candles!"), has thoroughly enjoyed all the birthday celebrations! But now we have to wait the whole year for more!

Prayer, a Rendezvous

Jesus said, "When you pray, go into your own room, shut your door and pray to your Father privately. Your Father who see all private things will reward you." He made prayer sound more like a secret rendezvous than a spiritual discipline. 

Where do you meet with God? 

It's funny how different times in my relatively short experience of Christian life I've found myself in a variety of prayer "closets". I often met God on an early morning run, my running shoes covered in a layer of Mexican desert dust while my heart centered in Christ as the sun rose over the mountains. Sometimes it was the quiet deserted sanctuary of the church on campus, all echoes and cool freshness, no matter the temperature outside. Then there was the season of grabbing a blanket and a thermos of coffee and walking down to the sand, finding a spot to join the waves in their continual praise of the Almighty.

Currently, this is my place to meet God.

My favorite is to be sitting down at the table with a cup of freshly brewed coffee, my bible and the specific verses on index cards outlining my prayer requests, a playlist of worship songs playing over the speaker, and a sleeping toddler in the other room. It's sweet. 

When I think about what all these places have in common, it's amazing to me, first of all that the God of the Universe met me in all those places. Also, I'm struck by God' faithfulness in teaching me and guiding me to what works for me. I think it's safe to say we, as God's children, have different prayer styles, unique settings that draw us to our Father. Over the years I've learned mornings work best for me, something about starting the day with Him. Music is always a big part of getting my heart in sync with God. The view helps too. But the most important thing I've learned regarding prayer is the depth and richness added by praying God's Word back to Him. Ultimately, He knows better than I what I need, what my friends and family need, what the nations need, what the day holds, and from experience I can say He faithfully leads me to the Scriptures that move my heart to partner with Him in what He's doing. That's a beautiful thing. 

Switching gears, lately I've been challenged to listen to my own words as I pray. Do I sound like I really believe that Jesus Himself sits across the table from me? Listening, asking questions, smiling, reaching out His hand with compassion in His eyes. Is prayer just a way for me to process my own thoughts? Does it feel more like my words are just drifting away into space? Or is it a true rendezvous--a conversation between good friends? I desperately want the latter. That's what has me getting up from the table feeling rested, centered, ready as I go to attend the, "Mama! Mom!" cries coming from down the hall.  

What works for you? Where do you meet God--right now, or where have you met Him in the past? I'd love to see a photo!